Libby Doe

RULE #1 - DON'T ARGUE WITH YOUR HUSBAND
The number one rule to being married to a strong man is this—never fight or argue with your Strong Man husband. Never. Just don’t do it. I don’t care what the situation is, just don’t do it. I have learned from experience that women who fight and argue with their Strong Man husbands can literally never win. The reason for it is two fold:

1. You’re not biblically allowed to be argumentative or contentious, no matter what. So why argue with your husband if you are going to have to repent for having a contentious spirit in the end anyhow?

2. Most of the time, you are going to be wrong. It’s that simple. Your husband is at least 1,000 times more intelligent, experienced, and comprehensive in his form of thinking than you. He has a million things in his mind and he is thinking, calculating, and imagining things in ways you couldn’t even dream of. So no matter what you feel in the moment, you’re not going to end up being right. It’s like a chess grandmaster competing against a 5 year old. Why even bother? What’s the point? That little 5 year old kid doesn’t even belong at the table with the grandmaster. And no matter how much you think you are his intellectual equivalent, or how much you think you are a true contemporary of his, or how badly you just want to be right, you are not.

Give it up. Stop being argumentative and contentious. Make this a rule for yourself: never fight, argue, or act contentious with your husband. Never. No matter what. Even if he has committed some egregious sin.

Your husband is like a brick wall (more on this later), and if you fight with him, you will not win. It’s like attacking a brick wall; you’ll only hurt yourself.

And the most important reason to never be contentious with your husband is because it is unbiblical and it is a sin! How many scriptures have we already read about it?

• Proverbs 19:13 “…And the contentions of a wife are a constant dripping.”
• Proverbs 21:9 "It is better to live in a corner of a roof than in a house shared with a contentious woman."
• Proverbs 25:24 "It is better to live in a corner of the roof than in a house shared with a contentious woman."
• Proverbs 27:15 "A constant dripping on a day of steady rain and a contentious woman are alike."

Plainly stated, you are sinning if you are a contentious wife. Don’t be one. Stop fighting! Stop creating arguments. Just don’t do it. Don’t make excuses for WHY you feel justified in arguing. You are not justified. God is against you if you are a contentious wife. It is as simple as that.

RULE #2 - DON'T WASTE HIS TIME
Strong Men are uniquely predisposed to loathe time wasting (Ephesians 5:16). The reason for this is simple: he has so many duties, responsibilities, obligations, and things that he has to get done on a daily basis, that he can't afford to waste his time (Psalm 90:12). A Strong Man doesn't just have his 9 to 5 duties, he has a higher calling. So he is constantly aware of the clock and the calendar that are working against him.

Plainly stated, time is a Strong Man's most valuable asset. He will more than likely be more frustrated with you causing him to lose or waste his time than he will with you causing him a loss of money or any other tangible asset.

And what is the biggest waste of time that emotionally weak women bring to their relationships with their Strong Man husbands? Contention and strife, of course. Because all of that contention, whether it was in the form of an actual argument, or just negative energy between the spouses (or if it was dramatic scenarios that were caused by your emotional toxicity), none of it was valid. None of it had any legitimate reason to exist. It was all just a waste of time. So don't do it.

RULE #3 - DON'T BE AN EXTRA BURDEN
Remember that the entire purpose of a wife in the marriage relationship, as stated by God Himself is for you to be a helpmeet to your husband. HELP. H-E-L-P. That is the operative word. Now let's take a look at what the dictionary definition of that word is:

help. To make it easier for (someone) to do something, to improve (a situation or problem); or to be of benefit to.

Plainly stated, if you're not making your husband's life easier, or improving situations in his life, or being a benefit to him in some specific way(s), then you are completely out of order with God's design and plan for your life. You are just as much out of alignment with God's created order as homosexuals are. Literally. They are rebelling against God's created order and so are you if you are not being a help to your husband.

Remember the wise Proverb about a virtuous woman: "She does him good and not evil all the days of her life?" Proverbs 31:12.

Remember, your Strong Man husband can support the weight of you, but usually in doing so, he has to let something else go. That means that by emotionally sustaining your spirit and your spiritual baggage, something has to give in his life. And usually its some element of the advancement of the Kingdom of God that God had called him to fulfill.

Do you remember the great story about Moses holding up his hands over the battle so Joshua and the Israelites could defeat the enemy? Here it is:

Exodus 17:11-13 "And so it was, when Moses held up his hand, that Israel prevailed; and when he let down his hand, Amalek prevailed. But Moses’ hands became heavy; so they took a stone and put it under him, and he sat on it. And Aaron and Hur supported his hands, one on one side, and the other on the other side; and his hands were steady until the going down of the sun. So Joshua defeated Amalek and his people with the edge of the sword."

This is such an incredible story. Moses is definitely a Biblical Strong Man. And God had a special anointing and calling on his life. And in this instance, in order for God's people to defeat their enemy, it was necessary for Moses to physically hold up his hands over the battle. But one man can only do this for so long, no matter how strong he is. And the Bible literally says that when Moses got tired and let his hands down, the enemy would prevail!

So in order to defeat the enemy, Aaron and Hur had to each hold up Moses hands until the enemy was thoroughly defeated. I want you to picture that image in your mind. Now imagine Moses is your husband. Your job is to be like Aaron and Hur. You need to help your husband and not hinder him. Hold up his hands, don't hang off of them.

Imagine that image all over again, and imagine you hanging off of one of his arms. Sure your husband is strong, and he will be able to hold you up for a certain amount of time. But eventually, his arm will get heavy, especially with you hanging off of it, and he will let it down and the enemy will prevail. And the advantage that the enemy gets in this instance will basically be all your fault.

Every morning when you wake up, ask yourself the simple question: am I going to hold up my husband's arms today or am I going to hang off of them? Will I help him or hinder him? Will I be a blessing or a burden? Will I do him good and not evil today?

You can do this. You were made to do this. This is the Will of God for your life. And once you do it, the beauty and the glory of God's blessings in your life will be more than you can even imagine or handle.